No one will care.... No one will care.

I suppose she's dead. I cannot be sure, because her path never crossed mine and made any huge difference; she and I were quite different and I am not sure I'd have ever been able to be her friend or even desire her friendship too greatly. Yet I did not despise her.

I suppose she's dead now, because that is what everyone is saying on her now (surely) defunct facebook page.

The words people leave are thoughtful, I suppose: they say they miss her and I can imagine that they do or will. But life goes ever on- and much faster, too- for her friends here show no sign of sadness on their electronic manifestation of their psyches. Their lives go ever on in mundane actions and thoughts.

I wonder: if she is dead, is the life she lived worth it to her? I assume she is somewhere, just not alive on this planet. Was her life what she desired it to be? Did all the teenage averageness amount to a life that was fulfilling?

I don't say this to shame her or her memory. I hope she had a life better than what I would expect of any teenager. I wish she wasn't dead: not only because it shakes my fragile ego, but also because I don't want her to be dead. I don't want someone my age to run into the completion of their life now...

A Stand Which Need Be Made

Harbored in realization or not..
Always producing an evil that someone must realize.
To hate is to murder, but
Empty consciences shall ever deny it.

Through a link provided in my world history course (which I take online), I stumbled upon a website- www.genocide.org (which I cannot quite determine whether it supports genocide or denounces it or chooses to be stupidly "unbiased")- which, in turn, brought me to many websites that instill within me a deep sorrow and fear in response to their cold, "logical" philosophies on race, eugenics, hate, love, religion, and philanthropy, all based on facts which are viewed and interpreted through an incredibly biased and heartless paradigm.

Nothing that brings me to worry for society as a whole was absent from the pages I scanned. Whole groups of people proclaimed Hitler the most important man of all, denied the Holocaust, talked of forced sterilization in impassive tones, and lifted up white "gentiles" as the most superior of all races, while simulatenously and paradoxically claiming that no race is greater than another, just each should be kept separate and form their own nations.

I realize, with bittersweet relief, that today few prescribe to such beliefs, but that many, many could potentially do so if they were confronted with the messages that such groups claim. The seeds- the very beginnings- of hatred have always been sown here in abundance.. Even among those who are "good" people.

I know many, many people- young and old alike, good and bad- who express contempt at America's increasing minority groups and frequently verbalize their sentiments that immigration be curbed and "aliens" be deported. The fault I see in that? For one, to say such a thing places our lives- Americans- at a greater value than those born in extreme poverty in, say, Puerto Rico, because we "deserve" to preserve our country as-is for ourselves rather than try to incorporate them into the type of better life we wish to have.

Then there are those who complain of the special benefits available to minorities- superficial things such as BET, or things designed to help them advance beyond their circumstances, such as special college funds, etc.- when impoverished white people "do not have such things." Ideally, I believe such things should be available to all without bias- no prejudice from those not of European descent against "whites" or of "whites" against others, but such a world we do not live in yet (if ever).. But to wish to deprive minorities of the opportunity to establish a good life (that which we desire for ourselves and our posterity!) is wholly wrong and sets one on a slippery slope towards further mistreatment. (If you're not with them, you're against them- in all aspects).

But even more mundanely, there are those of us who simply wish to stay to ourselves and look out for only ourselves, leaving others to die- usually emotionally but, in the case of neglect to support charitably in receiving food, clean water, or shelter, physically. This is where it all begins. The normalcy of "self-preservation" through selfishness leads to the slightly larger indicators of hate which, if unchecked, lead to the rationalization of denying people of liberty and life based on race, religion, or lifestyle. Never do we have the authority to decide who should live well, live poorly, or die. Never should be pretend we do. For where such a huge evil is, no good can thrive anywhere. If you reap hatred and apathy.. You will sow it, with a ten-fold return.

Hate isn't a joke or something to be taken lightly. No human has the power to control hatred, whether that hatred be towards an individual or a group. To allow hatred is to allow death- and to be an active hand in it.




That, readers, is a rather unsatisfactory statement on my general life-view. This could easily tie in with aspects of my life, but to do so at this moment seems to me blasphemous and utterly selfish and wrong. Because some things aren't about me. Some things are about us all.