Saturday, October 1, 2011


It's October in the land where the Night Mare resides, as it very well may be where you are. This- the arbitrary arrival of fall once again- means that meaning must be sought, found, questioned, and wondered. This means that I cannot afford- don't want to afford- not blogging.

I've been wondering again about how wise it is for me to blog the type of things I blog. My blog is an online diary of all the things I'd try to tell someone if I they were close to me and if I were able. It being thus, much of me doesn't mind the regurgitation of my self into the cyberworld- it's a lot like if I had a best friend- but part of me wishes there was more sacredness to the whole process and, of course, a lot more resolution and clarity (which comes about when you are able to discuss things with people in person). But for now- for the month of October- this blog will suffice, as it has for some time.

For the sake of content, I'll inform you of what I've been up to in my half willingly, half accidental absence. It's school, really. The seven and a half classes I'm taking (all of which but one are college-level) keep me rather occupied, and due to laziness, I spend the rest of my free time either walking around to aid my body with it's disease or with W., also usually walking around (or stupidly using the internet while he's around.. But that's another "YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS GOING TO PASS YOU BY" panic for another day). I'm getting eager to be done, somewhat, with all the work. Yet even if I do graduate high-ranking in high school, surely I'll strive for the same excellence in college, so... My days of intense schooling are not yet over in the least. (But it is tempting to take on less as I progress in college... But time is always of the essence... Right?) Now that fall is here, and with it cooler winds that awaken one to better things, I wish to make more of it.

There's just one last thing I wish to mention. My goal of making friends this year is not utterly failing, and for that I am grateful. I have yet to develop a close relationship with anyone, but I've very partially re-established some communication with old friends at my high school and have, just a small bit, been talking more with people at PHCC. In other words, I'm feeling quite hopeful, but still not much in the way of tangible results... (In other other words, no one has run up to me and begged to be my very best friend, to which I begrudgingly agree and proceed to have a relationship the depth of which takes years to form instantaneously... [By the same ticket, no large group of Christian, Vegan, Me-type people has recruited me into their social circle, wherein they weekly get together at their cozy abodes and serve vegan, sugar-free baked goods and tea... Fancy that. You'd think they'd have reached out to me already!])

And that was my September.

To do in October:
  • Read a horror story once per day.
  • Hone the art of vegan baking.
  • Procure a job as a CNA.. But first pass the test.
  • Listen to all my Smashing Pumpkins CDs.
  • Do one long walk at my local nature park.

1 comment:

Marvin the Martian said...

I'm glad you're doing good! It's nice that the summer heat is abating, isn't it? The Canadians are bummed that it's going to start snowing again. They only get a few months snow-free. That's why they all come to Florida.

Work hard finishing up high school, so you're used to working hard in college. You will probably work harder in college than you ever will in your life.

I'm glad you're making some acquaintances, if not friends. There ARE no other people like you, so don't worry about finding them. ;-) But you'll develop some good relationships at college I think, with classmates.

After you're done with the Pumpkins, try Devo! >;->

Blog what you want, when you want. It's your blog. No one knows who you are - it's not Facebook. So I think you're reasonably safe. Or just couch your thoughts of "I know this person who" so it's not so obviously you. That's what I do sometimes.

Off to San Francisco to hobnob with 30,000 geeks at the Oracle conference. Yippee skip.