Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Oh, Sylvia.

Oh, Sylvia Plath, my distraught, beautiful, intelligent, and foolish idol. You who killed yourself. You who reminds me precisely of the part of me that threatens my own doom. You once wrote in your journal that you loved too much or not at all, and I am much the same. Either I have little interest- none sufficient to satisfy the desire of whomever finds interest in me- or I am enraptured and obsessed beyond what I dare admit to anyone. 

Sylvia, are you and I as alike as it seems we might have been? Tell me, did you know the mysterious, rare feeling that tells you (as the most trusted clear indicator) when you meet one whom you could love, if a relationship were to form? If so, my friend, how often did it come around for you? And to what result?

We are women: to feel what I feel is foolish, for only by the grace of God are two united who have the potential to love each other equally. And I, being a woman, can do nothing to gauge this or probe it, to do so would be folly.. I must only wait.. And prolong the silent joy of being INTERESTED in a fellow mortal and the constant fear of making a fool of my intuition and desires..


Marvin the Martian said...

Oh, how I wish you could find a better inspiration than the self-destructive, selfish Sylvia Plath, who abandoned her children through suicide. Nowadays we know that when a parent kills themselves, the children are much more likely to do so as well. It's a horrible legacy to leave to one's children. I can't fathom it myself, but I don't have children. ;-)

So many other strong, inspirational women to choose from. Katherine Hepburn, or Grace Kelly. Or if we must stick to authors, then Anne McCaffrey, or Jane Austen.

Anyway. Hope springs eternal for love, doesn't it. I know things will turn out well for you.

Lydia said...

I know, I know. I feel terribly for her children. It wasn't right and wouldn't have been even if she had been childless.. Yet still I know what she must have felt..

I shall respond again later. My newspaper period is ending.

Nightmare said...
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Nightmare said...

Sadly human's are too unique and plentiful to ever truly find a significant other..

Waiting would be foolish, experimenting would be wise.