An end? A brief respite? Or strength to carry through?

God, are you not known to work in ways unconventional?
If I am offered this chance, can I pass it?
Few are those who are to me
That which I have prayed daily for.

Psalm 88:

"...You have taken from me my closest friends
and have made me repulsive to them.
I am confined and cannot escape;....

Do you show your wonders to the dead?
Do those who are dead rise up and praise you?...

From my youth I have been afflicted and close to death;
I have suffered your terrors and am in despair...

You have taken my companions and loved ones from me;
the darkness is my closest friend."

Being that the world is a neurotic in nature as I can be, I cannot know whether this peace and happiness brought upon by what might, in the end, prove to be the silliest and most over-inflated blessing shall stay with me, or, if it does, in what form. I cannot discern the future for certain, so I shall rejoice and strengthen myself today.

To have a friend, even if tomorrow or the day after it all comes to naught, sustains me enough to give me some hope. I never expected to be given one again the old, dusty, mythical connection I felt before- and never did I think it would come from anyone but the one who I had allowed to intentionally and unintentionally scar me.

Perhaps, if you save my earthly life once, I may one day have strength to help save your eternal life, as well.

For now, thank you, God. Thank you, for even after I lost my friends and the companionship and emotional and psychological comfort they provided for me, you sent me something. Someone- a real life mortal- for me.